Deep Play - Do you want to tell me something, Woman?!

by Caliko

"Preventer Chang! Congratulations! I heard this morning!" Someone called out to him as he walked inside Headquarters that afternoon.

Wufei turned, giving the cadet a strange look. He looked sincere enough, his eyes actually shone as if he were happy for him, but why would a stranger congratulate him? Chang nodded thanks, before continuing upstairs. He shook his head, confused.

"So, when is it due?" The touchy -feely lady from payroll was making a beeline for him, her arms outstretched to hug the pilot. Whimpering, he turned around and ran in the opposite direction. Maybe she would believe him if he claimed to not see her...

:::What is going on?::: He thought, stumbling up the back stairwell. :::OH!! They must have heard of Trowa's plan, and now they think it's real!:::

Relieved, he went in search of Sally, to share the laugh before they went and corrected everyone's mistake. He took the long way around, dodging excited good wishes as he kept his eyes open for his partner. Not finding her anywhere else, he finally asked the first person he came to.

Walking into Zechs' office, he groaned as he saw the smirk on the older man's face.

"Don't say it. It's a misunderstanding! This will all be cleared up by tonight." He said, anticipating the older man's words. "Have you seen Sally?"

"She went out with Noin to get pizza for lunch. They just left, so if you hurry, you can meet them."

"Oh.. ok. Thanks." Wufei dashed back downstairs and out to the parking lot, freezing at the sight that awaited him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Oh man, Heero! We just MIGHT have gone too far!" Duo said, as the three men watched from Zech's window.

"Death just may be worth it. Yup.. here it comes." He answered, watching Wufei pull the katana out from it's sheaf and started decapitating the bushes in the parking lot. Frustrated, he shoved the blade home, donned his newly frilled helmet, and pulled the new 'saddle bags' from the bike.

"A baby bonnet glued to his helmet... Duo, you have nerve." Zechs laughed, watching as Chang realized that his tooled leather saddle bags had been replaced with hot pink diaper bags.

"Oh, this is just too cruel." Une said, as she walked into the office to see what they were watching. "You do realize that Sally hasn't told him yet?"

The men stared at her, just before cracking up even more. "Oh gods! Where is the video camera when we need it?"

"Trowa is taping everything, don't worry. We are nothing, if not thorough." Duo chortled, watching as the 05 pilot threw the diaper bags onto the lawn and take off... wearing a frilly motorcycle helmet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Woman! Can you tell me why everyone seems to think that Trowa's plan is based on fact?" Wu said, slamming his lacy motorcycle helmet down on the table.

Noin and Sally stared, bemused, at the offensive head protection, as if they expected something to pop out.

"Wu.. What happened?" Sally finally asked, choking back her laughter.

"Someone must of heard about Trowa's plan.. which is making me wonder about our security. Anyway, Rumor has it that you really are pregnant! I've been tortured all morning!" He complained, grabbing the last slice of pizza off of Sally's plate.

"I wanted that." She said, a strange warning note in her voice.

"Hmmph!" He grunted, but he threw a five onto the table. "Go get another."

Chang was oblivious to how close he was to getting killed as Sally grabbed the bill and got up. She smirked as she accidentally stepped on his toes with the heel of her dress pumps.

"Ow! Klutzy woman." he groused, finishing his slice. "Sal, when we get back, I want you to help me straighten this mess out. We don't need the distractions right now."

::::Should I just tell him now?::: Sally watched as he wiped his mouth with her napkin. :::No. Not public enough.:::

"C'mon, Sally. Eat your pizza. I want to get this straightened out. As if we would be irresponsible enough to create a baby with our lifestyle."

:::Oh no. Definatly not public enough.::: She said, eyes slitted.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They had just gotten back to the office, when Duo came running up to them. He wore a worried look on his face, and was panting.

"Wu, Sally! Lady Une wants you two in her office.. now." he said, shooting Noin a strange look.

"What is this about, Duo?" Chang asked, impatient to get the misunderstanding fixed.

"I don't know, Wu. Tell you the truth.. I don't WANT to know. She's PISSED! Kinda reminds me of the old Lady Une." He started backing away, shaking his hands in denial. "Come see me if you survive!"

Sally started laughing. "He does tend to exaggerate, doesn't he?"

They walked down the hall to their commander's office, each wondering what was in their immediate future. Opening the door, they walked in, only to stop short at the crowd of people shoved inside. Duo was just entering from the side door, and came to the front of the crowd. Hilde was waiting for him, standing next to Relena and Catherine. Heero, Trowa, and Quatre were ignoring their entrance, watching the video screen instead.

The video, of course, was the one made that afternoon, when Wu found his bike. Lady Une, Zechs, and Noin smiled, and then Noin handed them the office's gift.

"Congratulations, Sally and Wufei! I know you two are going to be great parents!"

"Parents?" Wufei was nervous, looking at Sally. "Woman, why does everyone think you're pregnant? Everyone here KNOWS that it's just a part of Trowa's plan!"

His hand was tight around the door jam, the knuckles white with tension. His eyes begged Sally for understanding, as he fought to keep the shock from settling in.

"Wu...." She began, screwing up her face in embarrassment. "Isn't it strange how a lie will sometimes become truth?"

"Wha?" Chang blinked, suddenly feeling very, very dizzy.

"Well.. I just found out... that I'm really pregnant." She closed her eyes, knowing that he was going to blow his stack. Wu hated to be the last to know anything.

He sat down on the floor where he stood, and started to draw his breath in and out quickly. There was some part of his mind that understood what was happening. He was hyperventilating. He was forcing the air out too fast to breath, and he would probably pass out because of it. At this point, he couldn't wait. Anything to escape the embarrassment of having the entire office know before he did.

"Wufei? Are you alright?" Relena crouched in front of him, her hand on his shoulder.

"Whooo...whaaaa....OOohhhhh..." He could speak.. just not intelligibly.

"He's fine! C'mon, Chang! Stand up and have some cake." Duo encouraged, holding the forkful of chocolate cake in front of him.

"EVERYONE OUT!" He shouted, standing up. Waving his arms up and down, he practically pushed the crowd out of the packed office. He was oblivious to the fact that it wasn't even HIS office.

"YOU!" He advanced on Sally, "YOU should have told me! You had no right to keep this from me!"

"Now, Hold on, Chang! I just found out this week! I was waiting for a good time!" She said, backing up.

The wall was closer than she thought, and she soon felt it underneath her palms.

"A good time? Such as?"

"Such as when Bethany Cecil was in custody?" She tried.

His eyes blazed, as he realized exactly what had been going on in her confusing woman's thought patterns.

"YOU are out of the line of fire! I mean it, Sally! You can monitor from the van with Trowa!"

"No, Wufei. The plan depends on me. It's too late to just cut me out of it!"

"I just did." He said, his voice frozen in anger. "You will not risk my child any longer."

"Wu..." She began, reaching out to touch his shoulder.

"Don't touch me, Sally. Not.. not right now. You don't know how angry I am, that you would hide this from me!"

He shrugged off her touch, then stormed out of the office. She flinched, tears rolling slowly out of her eyes as the door slammed shut behind him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~