"Burn Baby, Burn!"

by: the archduke

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing and I'm not making any money off of this fic.

Note: This is based on a true story. The names have been changed to protect the stupid.

"Come on Quatre, this is gonna be so cool! Look..." the voice said as it showed his companion an article in a magazine. "...the directions are all here. It'll be a piece of cake."

Quatre looked over at the boy skeptically. "Duo, I don't think this is safe. I mean, what if it gets out of hand. Lady Une will surely terminate us." Quatre was wringing his hands together in a nervous gesture at the thought of being fired from his job.

Duo merely rolled his eyes and sighed. "Quatre, we were Gundam pilots. I think we'll be able to handle a little smoke. Besides, we'll be down in the basement so Lady Une won't find out." A smile spread across Duo's lips. "You know what they say, what she dosen't know can't hurt us."

Before Quatre could voice any more objections Duo grabbed his hand and led him out of the office. "It'll be fun Quatre. Trust me."

"Famous last words."

The two boys were in the basement of the building that housed the Preventers along with certain high ranking government officials. They were hunched over an open magazine, and if someone was to look over their shoulders they would have seen the headline 'How to Make a Blowtorch with Household Items'.

"Okay, let's see. Do we have everything?" Duo and Quatre had gone to the store earlier to pick up the items necessary for their little project. Quatre was still a bit nervous about making a blowtorch, but decided that it would be better if Duo had some sort of supervision. Quatre looked over the list of materials needed and then cross-checked it with the things that they had bought.

"Yes, it seems that we haven't forgotten anything." He then looked over at his friend who had an excited gleam in his eyes. He decided to give it one last try.

"Duo, there really isn't any practical reason for doing this. I mean, if you really want a blowtorch I'll buy you the very best one available."

Duo shook his head. "It isn't about the end product Quatre, it's about the process. Sure, anyone can just go out and buy a blowtorch, but it takes a special kind of person to actually take the time and make one."

"And you're that person, aren't you Duo?"

He smiled. "Damn straight. Now, let's get started."

They were all outside, staring almost as if they were in a trance. One minute they were working, doing paperwork, researching, having meetings, when the next they're standing outside, watching as the firetrucks blazed across the front lawn, sirens blazing and fire hoses criss-crossing all around the area.

Lady Une was pacing back and forth, wondering what exactly could have happened. A terrorist attack? Sabatoge? An assasination attempt? At the last thought her eyes strayed to one of the most important people in the world, who also happened to have their offices in the builing in question. Relena was leaning against a tree, a look of shock on her face. Lady Une made a move towards the girl when she was stopped by a fireman.

"Lady Une?" The man asked as she turned to him.

"Yes. May I help you with anything?"

"I think we found the cause of the fire."

Duo was standing in the parking lot with his hands in his pockets, the picture of innocence. He had been careful to keep a low profile since the incident. The last thing he wanted to do was bring attention to himself. He glanced towards his accomplice and frowned. Quatre was biting his nails, his eyes wide and full of guilt. Before Duo could go over and tell his friend to play it cool he felt a hand on his arm and turned to find an angry Lady Une along with a man dressed in typical fireman garb. He swallowed and gave them a grin which they did not return.

Lady Une then looked in the direction that Duo had been heading in before, and came across an agitated Quatre.

One word flashed through her mind. "Bingo."

Duo and Quatre had been sitting at a picnic table that was located on the property. They just sat there with Lady Une, no one speaking until Quatre finally broke.

"I admit it! It was me!" As Lady Une opened her mouth to respond, Quatre continued. "But he made me!," he said as he pointed an accusing finger at Duo.

Duo stood up as if he had been greatly insulted. "I have no idea what he's talking about." At the disbelieving look Lady Une was giving him he sighed. "Okay, okay, we did it. But it was an accident."

Lady Une finally got the chance to speak. "What exactly happened?"

Seeing that Quatre was too shaken to talk Duo took the initiative. "We were just working on a little project when things got out of hand. Nothing else." His attempt at vagueness failed.

"What were you making?"

Duo took that moment to take a look at his surroundings, effectively avoiding Lady Une's question.

He heard her say in a stern tone, "Duo..."

He said it so low and so quickly that she missed it. Almost. "A homemade blowtorch!?"

Duo nodded, not meeting her gaze. Just then Quatre decided to enter the conversation. "Lady Une, it really was an accident. You see, we were testing it out on a piece of paper. It worked surprisingly well, and the paper immediately caught on fire. Then we sort of," after a slight hesitation he continued, "panicked. We tried blowing it out but succeeded in blowing it right into the storm drain. It then began to smolder and there was a lot of smoke, and then that's when we pulled the fire alarm." Quatre finished his story, waiting to see what reaction his superior would have.

She stood up and said, "The fire department said that it was a smoldering piece of paper that caused all the smoke. Your story checks out." As she made a motion to leave both Duo and Quatre brightened when they thought they would escape unscathed.

Their faces dropped as she added, "By the way, you two are suspened for two weeks."

Quatre put his head in his hands while Duo just shrugged. "I guess we'll be getting a vacation, huh Quatre?"

He looked up from his hands, wondered what exactly went through a mind like Duo's, then proceeded with his previous activity.

From the author: As I stated before this is a true story. The exact same thing happened in my dorm, with the homemade blowtorch and everything. The title "Burn Baby, Burn!" is a direct quote that I was told someone said as the firetrucks were pulling up to the building.

Moral of the story: Homemade blowtorches are a big no-no.