Eliminating a Rival

Duo stared up the stairs at his wife, vengeance in his eyes.

"Babe, is there something you wanted to tell me?" His voice was soft and low, as if he was locking his teeth against what he really wanted to say.

"DUO! Welcome home, honey!" She tried to act innocent, but her hubby wasn't buying.

"So, Babe.. What happened while I was gone?"

"Nuthin...." She inched backwards, knowing that he wasn't buying. Sure enough, he held both oil pans out, and smirked. Seeing this, Hilde ran for the back door. She didn't make it.

Duo tackled her from behind, knocking the wind out of her. Swiftly, he twisted, landing on his back to cushion her fall.

"Hilde, what did you do to my car?"

He grabbed her flailing hands in one fist, using the other to lock around her waist.

"Hmmmm.. What makes you think it was me? Duo, I can't even DRIVE a stick!"

"You ran."

::::::(Gulp) Gee, Hilde.. that was bright..:::::

"I launched it..."

"That's all?" Duo knew that that couldn't be it....

"It was over two sets of industrial railroad tracks."

"Yeah....." An ugly image was forming in his mind.

"I bounced a total of four times...and I must have caught something, cause I put a hole in your oil pan..."

"A total of four times?" He asked, thinking, :::Well, she beat my record.:::

"Yeah... You mad?"

"Hilde, you tried to hide it from me. Don't you think that deserves some punishment?"

:::::PUNISHMENT? IS HE NUTS?::::

"All's fair in love and war?" she tried.

"Nu uh.."

"I'm sorry, and It will never happen again?"

"Not even close.."

"I'll help you rebuild it?"

"Getting there.."

"Naked?"

"BINGO! We have a winner!"

Hilde twisted around, her eyes wide in shock.

"I was only kidding!" she insisted.

"You suggested it, Babe." He smirked, imagining her nubile body streaked with grease in interesting places.....

Hilde tried another tack....

"Duo... It could take you six months to find a new supplier.... Wouldn't you like a little sumthin-sumthin now, instead?"

She rubbed her lower torso into his, trying to make him forget her 'punishment'. With Half lowered lashes, she started to nibble on his bottom lip, smiling to herself when she felt his hardness push against her.

"Oh, I'll have a little of that, too. Babe... You have just become the perfect wife."

"What do you mean?" suspicion hung from her words.

"Until I have my replacement parts, you are going to make me a VERY happy man.. Breakfast in bed every Friday, laundry done AND FOLDED every Saturday. Sunday comes around, and I want FOOD waiting for me in front of the TV. OH!! and quiet during the game! A strip tease during half time would be nice, and of course, you can help me in the shower. All this hair isn't easy to manage, y'know! I need help washing it, and of course, you'll have to dry and brush it. Braiding will be nice. Hell, why don't you just make yourself available for the entire shower! I really LIKE how you scrub my back."

The idiot went on and on, paying no attention to the steam coming out of his wife's ears.

"Is that all?" she said, really wanting to bash his face in a bit.

"For now. I'll get back to you if I think of anything else...."

"Duo?"

"Yes, Wifey?" He asked, smirking in his oblivion.

"SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!"

"What? But.. Babe! You KILLED my car! You should be happy for the chance to make it better!"

"Duo Maxwell, you will choose ONE task that you would like, and I will do it. The rest? you will take your turn when it comes! YOU cook every other day. YOU will do the laundry in your week, and YOU CAN FORGET ABOUT WATCHING THE GAME! As for a bathing assistant, I'll be too busy."

"But... but... "

"Err... I won't have to cook for six months?" He spit out, frightened by the incensed look in HIlde's eyes.

"Deal." She held out her hand and he took it. Afterwards, he just realized that she won the argument. SHE was the one to kill his car.. SHE should make up for it! Instead, she made him feel grateful for a slight reprieve from cooking.

:::How does she do that?::: He shook his head, knowing that he would have to play his ace early. Going over to the closet, he activated the trap door. Minutes later, a set of steps decended into the bowels of Maxwells garage.

He waited for the overhead lights to come up, and then started down a long hallway lined with car parts. At the end lay a locked, steel door.

Pressing his palm against the electronic lock caused the steel hatch to swing open. Smiling, he walked over to the corner of the safe and started piling parts onto a nearby wagon.

::::Silly Hilde.. Like I would only order ONE of everything for that car. Tomorrow, M'dear.. you'll be dancing naked in the garage, helping ME rebuild that motor.:::::

Now that she had effectively removed any fun he could have gotten from the situation, he no longer had a reason to delay.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That night, Duo was in a very good mood. Too good, if you understand my meaning. Hilde dished out the lasagna, nervously watching his fidgetting hands and listening to his gleeful chuckles. By now, he should have realized that he'd been suckered.. so why was he so cheerful? Finally, she broke.

"Duo... Why are you so happy?" She asked.

"Just thinking of tomorrow night, Babe." He smirked, anticipating her reaction.

"Tomorrow night?"

"Yup. When the boys go home, I expect you downstairs in the garage."

"Garage?"

"Hilde, are you having trouble hearing?" He laughed.

"No! Duo, what are you talking about?" Something told her that she wasn't going to like this.

"You are supposed to help me rebuild the engine...naked." he reminded her.

"But.. I thought you had to wait for parts!"

"OH! Didn't I tell you? I found my stash of extra's. I could probably build two motors. You don't think that I would only have ONE OF EACH made, do you?"

He walked away, laughing. Oh yeah... Vengeance was sweet......